Everyone Does It, Some Just Better Than Others

I was going to tell you a poop joke but, it’s really crappy.

If you don’t like talking about poop. You may not like this post. It’s nothing graphic but, it’s about pooping issues. 

Yesterday, I was in the middle of a nap when I was woken up by the most gut wrenching cramp. “Damn.” When I get woken up like that, I know what to expect next. I rolled out of bed and walked to the bathroom hunched over. It felt like the cramps were reaching into my soul. I sat on the toilet and just sat…. It felt like I needed to poop. My body wanted me to poop but, I couldn’t. I broke out into a sweat. It was like someone turned my body temperature to hell. I took my shirt off hoping to cool down. Nope. Now I was sitting on the toilet, naked, stomach twisted in knots, drenched in sweat, with a dog staring at me. This is exactly how I pictured my Saturday morning going. (Yeah, not so much.) “Crap.” (No pun intended) The nausea comes. Now I needed to figure out which was more important, trying to poop or trying to throw up. I usually choose throwing up because I hate feeling nauseated (I would just rather throw up) but, I chose pooping. Also because I didn’t have the energy to pick myself off the floor if I tried throwing up. So there I was, just sitting. 

Still sitting….

Damnit. I knew I should’ve used that 20% off coupon from Bed, Bath, & Beyond for the Squatty Potty instead but, noooo the meat thermometer was much more important. I haven’t used that damn thermometer yet, and here I am just sitting and my butt is going numb. I could’ve been having the best poop of my life right now.

After an agonizing 20 minutes, I heard a *ploop* and it’s over. The cramps subside and all that fuss was for a teeny poop. I’m used to my body being overly dramatic about everything (Hey fibromyalgia! I’m looking at you!). The cramps were over but, I was still drenched in my own sweat. I went to turn the air on and just laid in the middle of my bed. I finally stop sweating but, my body was hurting all over because now I had goosebumps from being cold. *Sigh* At least I was back to “normal.”

My bowels are pretty good the rest of the time. This happens to me about once a week but only at night for whatever reason.

According to The American Fibromyalgia Syndrome Association, “Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) – Constipation, diarrhea, frequent abdominal pain and bloating, abdominal gas, and nausea represent symptoms commonly found in roughly 40 to 70 percent of fibromyalgia patients.” 

I haven’t talked to my doctor about this issue. I always forgot to bring it up because for the past 10 years, I’ve been more focused on figuring out the chronic pain. Now that I know I have fibromyalgia, I would guess that I have some form of IBS since I’m also frequently nauseated and have abdominal gas. Next doctor appointment I’ll be sure to ask.

Poop count: 9 – I thought I used it way more than just that.

3 thoughts on “Everyone Does It, Some Just Better Than Others

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