If I had a dollar for each time someone told me that, I would be at least a millionaire.
Someone told me that I shouldn’t be tired and should be living my best life right now. Since I’m young and I don’t have any kids there’s no reason I should always be tired.
News flash: I have fibromyalgia. I’m tired All. The. Time. No exaggeration. I can sleep for hours on end, wake up, and still feel like I need another nap.
Prime example, last weekend I decided I need a mental health weekend (like a mental health day but, I made it a weekend). I called the weekend “couch life.” That was because I had no intention of doing anything but laying on the couch all weekend. And that’s exactly what I did. I didn’t go out (even though I had plans but they fell through), I didn’t do any work or homework. I was in a constant rotation of sleep, TV, social media, eat, bathroom, and take Polo out. After a weekend of literally doing nothing, you would think I got some rest, right? Well, you’re correct. I did get rest but, I was still tired.
Now the people that constantly question why I’m tired, know I have fibromyalgia. I told them that being tired is one of the symptoms. So they know this already. But yet they still question it. I’ve gotten to the point where I don’t even tell people I’m tired anymore. 🤷🏾♀️
But why am I so tired? With fibromyalgia, there are many variables that play into why you’re always tired. In the most simplest explanation, fibromyalgia is caused by overactive nerves. They’re constantly sending and receiving pain signals. That’s tiring in itself. Then on top of that, since you’re in pain, you can’t sleep. So, you toss and turn all night and get restless sleep (I apologize in advance to my future man). Then you have to deal with this while still managing life because you have to live, right? I have a full time and part time job, I go to school full time, and try to still have a somewhat okay social life. But I have no reason to be tired. Yeah, okay. 🙄
Even now I’m barely holding on at my desk. It’s supposed to rain today and everyday this week which I know is playing a big part into why I’m feeling extra shitty today. (I usually always feeling like shit but, there are days when I’m *dun duh dah dah* extra shitty).
I’m leaving here in a bit. When I get home the very first thing I’m going to do before I do any more work is take a horizontal life pause….a nap.